Two Sides to Every Coin (Most of you only see one)

Most of you know the outgoing, humorous, incredibly funny and witty side of me. I’m often talkative and social and happy to spend time with friends and get to know strangers. I don’t shy away from challenges and I love being around people, making jokes, making people laugh…mainly myself…. But…and this is something that only a very few understand about me, I’m also introverted and a loner at times (and by loner I mean solely taking care of my kids and being home with my family cause lets face it, being a parent means never having a moment alone). 😉  Its hard to explain how and why I get into these moments of self-prescribed isolation, but usually they only last a day or two. When I get stressed, like I have been lately, it lasts longer. I no longer feel like being around people, being witty, forcing myself to socialize or put on a false front. It’s funny, cause when I am quiet, friends ask me whats wrong. Usually nothing is, sometimes I just get tired of myself and don’t feel like being loud and obnoxious. Ha ha! The danger is that I get used to the routine and its very difficult for me to reach out and shake off the “lone wolf syndrome”. Nick, the hubs, says I care way to much what others think and take things too personally.  Which in turn pushes me further into my isolation. Its me. I can’t blame anyone for my actions. They are my own. But sometimes its having that one friend reach out and remind you that you’re needed, that the outside world is fun and worth participating in. I don’t know if its the kids heading off to school and its just me and the little guy at home (and he’ll be heading to preschool next week), if its nerves for this upcoming Crossfit event where I have stepped way out of my comfort zone and athletic ability to compete with legit professional athletes (a decision I made because I took something too personally), or if its a feeling of loss for the quality time I’ve had with my friends and family as this season of the year is always so very very busy for everyone. I know I need to shake it off. I know I need to break this weird funk I’ve been in for nearly a week. But its so easy to just stay quiet, to stay invisible.


About terminatormom

I'm a part-time stay at home mom of 3 adorable (albeit, crazy) kids who decided after kid #2 to get healthy. I've done the gamut of workouts including videos, at home workouts, gyms, bootcamps, fitness classes, and the mother of all things rough and tough....crossfit. I love training and delving into the world of nutrition to better my health and the health of my family. I'm a nerd and make no apologies for my bad jokes and quirky sense of humor. Oh, and my friends call me the "Terminator".
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